The Fuplers Kick off the Party!

Tonight is graduation party night. Rock on. It's time for luau and karaoke and scores of friends. Bo here, and Miss Maddie, are making a night of it by combining parties. Should be a great time!

But, parties put me in a silly mood and I'm thinkin' by the time midnight rolls around, I'm gonna be pretty hysterical. I'll be laughing at everything and nothing. And I want you to be laughin' with me. So I just HAVE to share the following video. Oregon cousins brought this to us and well, we've been tuning in regularly just so we can split seams all over again. If teenage boy descriptions of a body part everyone possesses offends you (no swearing involved), then I advise you not to watch. But if you are in possession of children, especially siblings, you will find this tame (unless yours are completely unlike mine, never fight, and always say only the sweetest things to each other.) That ain't life around our house and I think this may feature my mom mojo, especially the five-o'clock shadow.

The funniest thing is one guy plays the part of mom, dad, teenage brother, and little sister. Do yourself a favor and put your coffee down.

(P.S. Video run time is actually two minutes even though it says two-and-a-half.)

Dearly Departed......

And then there were none.

The last of my visiting cousins left early this morning to head back to Oregon. That group comprised Joey, his wife Laurie, and their girls, Elizabeth and Ashley, the 19-yr-old twins, Katie, The Wild Man's age and in full possession of a sensitive and curious mind, and Julianna, 11, the spitfire. We got to keep Elizabeth for the night on Monday (she is at college so she and Bo had a lot to talk about). And most came for lunch yesterday as we hung out and had great laughs. Ashley had to miss out on this part because she headed for Ukraine on a missions trip.

On Saturday night we hosted the Illinois/Iowa cousins. Kristen (on the left here) and Stasha (on the right) came rolling in for dinner and stayed into the wee hours of Sunday morning. I had never met Stasha. She moved to California in 1993 and, being the functional family we are, no one ever told us. The fact is, no one really has much of a relationship with anyone else and truth-telling is at a minimum. (If the craziness on both sides of this family tree gets any deeper, the Grand Canyon will look like a mud puddle in comparison. Ah, Egypt....I do NOT long for you. I LOVE the Promised Land!) In fact, she never knew she had family in California. And Kristen we saw, for the first and last time, once, when she was 15.


So here we are, the remnant, the truth-tellers. Some of the cousins and one Aunt, from both sides of my family, willing to look the facts in the eyeball and move forward. Willing to do the hard work of changing family legacies, by God's goodness and grace to us, and then gladly Lampooning everything within range, for sanity's sake. No "Leave It to Beaver" here. In fact, I think most everything must have gotten left to Beaver. Except the humor - who has more fun than a bunch of refugees from wacked-out families? And what we lack in family numbers we make up for in the largest and most supportive group of true friends - some of them refugees themselves. And the best thing about friends is you get to pick them. O yea, O YAY!

So goodbye, family. Thank you for the reconnect. I hope it grows and blossoms as we've all headed down our different paths of reconstruction. God bless us everyone. Especially the goofballs like Junlianna here with as many grapes in her mouth as she can shove in.

Copyright 2009

Heroes

Do you ever feel like there isn't enough good news? I quit taking the paper because if I'm going to write a "mostly" humor blog, I have to feel like laughing now and again and I sure don't get much inspiration from anything the paper offers. Now my family? Friends? You guys? Life in general? That gets me laughing or thinking (something I don't do all the time due to brain endangerment - hate to wear it out early), or you inspire me.

So do stories about selflessness.

My bloggy friend, Fruitcake Sandy at It's Never Too Late for a Happy Childhood has a brother and his wife who were featured in this month's Reader's Digest for their riveting tale of heroism. Above is a photo of them and you can read the story here. (He is also the uncle of my sweet friend, Bz, at The Mosquitos Buzz because Sandy's her mom. When you get to know what really great people they are - and that's no bloggy flattery, it's true - you won't be surprised that they are related to heroes like this.) I truly hope you give yourself the gift of reading this amazing story on her blog. I'll be looking for the Reader's Digest copy, too!

Sandy, I borrowed your photo of them without your permission but I hope you'll forgive me and knowing you, I think I'm good. :~)

Copyright 2009

Weather On The 8's - From My Foundation Garment

Several years ago The Wild Man was given a handy cloth calendar and weather chart. It hung on the wall of his bedroom and he could change the day and forecast by way of little number or picture pieces backed with velcro. This was fun for him for a short while but I think I played with it more until he made me take it down. Through the years, a few pieces fell off and disappeared.

As I was getting dressed Saturday, something under my bra strap felt uncomfortable. I reached for it and ferreted out a little cloth velcro sign stuck there. Somehow this thing materialized and decided to go for a ride through the laundry with my unmentionables - which I just mentioned.

I went outside and I'll be darned if this isn't what I saw:

Who knew these vital clothing articles had prophetic properties? Let's just hope I don't get word that my barometers are falling!

Copyright 2009

Minky's Marvels - I Believe I Can "Fly!"

Minky is a jumping bean. That's all there is to it. Her two favorite activities in life are running and jumping. She jumps when she doesn't need to. She is simply happiest when she is airborn. Thursday night, after all the cousin festivities and a quick trip downtown to see a young artist friend's gallery exhibition (more about that in another post with pictures of him and his amazing work), we took a few minutes for Minky frivolity. She loves to catch anything and this orange rubber thingy is a fav. My desk is on the left and the rocking chair is pushed out into the entry way so she doesn't crash on it. She looks like a reindeer here.

The higher the better as far as she's concerned. (Note my wild wallpaper of garden seed packets. I can't change it. No one will let me. We all love it. The End.)

But this one took our breath away. We were prayin' she stuck the landing. Our little bat - hanging from the ceiling upside down. She hit the ground on all fours rarin' to go again.

Who has more fun than Minky?

(P.S. Cruddy carpet disclaimer: The carpet is 20 years old and is clean but stained. It will be replaced by wood flooring which is here and in the garage but has not managed to put itself in yet. We have one room done - Bo's. We move at the speed of light - before you turn on the switch.)

Copyright 2009

The Florida Cousin

A quick update to keep you in the loop. Tricia, my Florida cousin-in-law, is here on the far left. Next to her is her mother-in-law, aka my Aunt Sandy (my favorite most wonderful aunt in the WHOLE WORLD). Of course, you know the other characters here. We had a FABULOUS time yesterday and I fed her everything I could think of because I love to feed people and they brought pie so we ate that, too. We all fought for airspace and talked like we had just seen each other ten minutes ago. She left her husband and kids back in Florida and is here to see family and friends and to remember she is a WOMAN, as well as a wonderful mom and wife. Doesn't that kind of break do us all good once in awhile? (Well, I guess you MEN reading this don't need to be reminded of your womanliness so you get a pass.) We women have a much harder time with it, generally, because taking care of everybody is what we do. And, of course, that isn't true universally but when Grizzly left a few minutes ago to go camping by himself (with JoJo as his only companion), he didn't look the least bit conflicted. I'm just sayin'.

The Bo, The Trish, The Aunt - We could not feature "The Donald" as his hair was in for its rabies shots.

Trish let me take a few pictures of her (and put up with me because this is NOT her favorite thing) but isn't this darling? I absolutely love photos of people laughing with their eyes closed. One of my favorite senior pictures of Bo was exactly like that. It embodies lovely abandonment to mirth. I'm big on mirth. This shocks you I know.

And one more, because I can.

The Illinois/California cousins are due in tomorrow. Updates coming but WAIT UNTIL YOU SEE these shots of Minky's Marvels in tomorrow's post. She got some serious air last night. It was other worldly. Not even human. Exactly.

Copyright 2009

Mea Culpa...Mea Crazy Woman of Many Cousins

Do you see these people? These people are all cousins of one sort or another from my biological father's side but connected to me through a PRECIOUS aunt (they are her children and grandchildren). The Aunt and I haven't seen the biological father for over 22 years for good and compelling reasons which don't belong in this post.

I haven't seen these cousins for about seven years for no good reason at all except life busyness and proximity. Last week we reconnected and did we every have a BALL. Unless you're around family all the time (and we're not) you forget that family wackiness and humor runs exTREMEly deep and is like finding an oasis in the Sahara. Right after our visit they left for Arizona to see more family on his wife's side. They'll be back tonight. What does this have to do with anything? Well, I'll tell you at some point, I'm sure, after you sit through some boring details. You're free to go now.

The guy standing to my right and hiding behind me is my cousin, Joey. (His lovely wife, Laurie, is on the far left and the rest of these beauties are their daughters. Except for me, Bo, and The Wild Man. We are not their daughters.) His brother, Rick, (another cousin) lives in Florida. His wife, Tricia, just arrived in town a few days ago and so we have another cousin we want to see. She is coming over for breakfast tomorrow. We haven't seen her in about four years.

Two days ago, my mother informed me that a niece from her side (my cousin) is in California on business. She lives in Illinois. She wants to get together. I haven't seen her in ten years. She also wants to pick up another cousin who actually lives in California. I have never met this cousin and had no idea she was in my same state. I lived part of my life in close proximity with her dad back in Illinois. Apparently, he and I don't talk very often. In fact, the last time we exchanged words was 32 years ago. We're not mad at each other and have never had a falling out. Our family just doesn't do "close" all that well. We only knew each other as kids for a short time and, well, life goes on. And one side or the other would have had to make family a priority. That didn't happen either. We have a serious legacy of non-bonding issues. Everybody can live without everybody else. (MAJOR EXCEPTION: My family - the one YOU know - is making deliberate changes to this rule and maybe cousins are beginning to feel the same.) So, these Illinois/California cousins are coming to town on Saturday and it would be good to see them.

But what are the odds that nine cousins from four different states, and different sides of the family, all converge, unbeknownst to each individual group, after many, many years apart, and all within a week of each other?

Do you realize the true, earth-shattering, underlying meaning of this? I HAVE TO CLEAN MY HOUSE!

I have bathtub caulking that is good enough for my kids' tub but not good enough for a cousin to look at if they sit down on the toilet and happen to see around the shower curtain. I have carpeting in the study that makes the dogs happy when they smell themselves on it, but which probably wouldn't recommend itself to visiting familia. I have kitchen grout that is light gray in design and dark gray in reality. Time for the Clorox and a toothbrush. I have a mountain of laundry - yes AGAIN. Who has time for laundry when you're graduating people, for Pete's sake?! I'm gonna try out that "move a mountain" Bible verse today and see if I can get my Mt. Everest over to my neighbor's house. Maybe they'll do it all before they realize it's not theirs.

So once again, I beg your kind and caring indulgence as I remain A.W.O.L. in Blogsville preparing for family and three weekends worth of graduation parties still to attend (including Bo's!). I am not visiting you. And I'm a worse person for it. I am missing out! But I sure coulda used you in the bathroom last night as I chiseled out the caulking with a hammer and screwdriver. I hit the tile with my knuckles so many times my hand looks like I'm a prizefighter. I could make up a great story to go with these bruised knuckles. Maybe I'll just abandon this whole cleaning and functionality idea and lay a bunch of empty booze bottles around while sprawling on the couch. I'll display my fighting hand and describe my most recent barroom brawl. I'll wave them toward my messy kitchen and empty fridge.

Yeah, that outta put off the next visit for another 20 years or so. I should SERIOUSLY write a book on entertaining. It's obvious I have a gift.

Copyright 2009