Death Defying Parenting + 30-Day Info

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Today is the first day of the rest of my sanity. Bo starts college today and she is 800% ready, willing, and able. She’s pushing back, reaching out, and stampeding forward. I feel like I’m locked in a chute with a raging bull at a rodeo and killing myself to get to the gate pull to let it escape. Forget riding the thing for 8 seconds. I’m just gonna run out behind, wave my hat at y’all, and let you clap for me that I survived the lock up. I don't mind hanging my head that I didn't even try and stay on. Yeehaw, girly! You go and head right for those clowns and barrels. I’ll be the one in the stands watchin’ you bounce and buck and beller as my life (and yours) flashes before me.

I had time to reflect on all this as Grizzly and I did the couples thing over the weekend in Cambria, at the beach. Don’t we all adore our children in absentia? It’s similar to watching them sleep. They seem perfectly angelic as the day’s madness drifts away. I had time to think about their baby days and all the sweetness and dear moments of mother/child bonding. I am THRILLED I got to become a mother. It almost didn’t happen. I went through four years of infertility, treatment, surgery, miscarriages, and obsession. That seems so distant now but was very present and overwhelming then. And I’m grateful beyond words we were blessed and I became a mother. But I’m beginning to think learning NOT to mother may be equally as hard. I think I have some death-defying lessons ahead but I’m gonna do my personal best to stay out of the bull pen.

By the way, I hope to get pics of Cambria up for you guys tomorrow. If I ever become technically savvy enough to transfer them out of Grizzly’s computer into mine, filter them through Picasa, upload them to my blog photo file, and then drop them into Windows Live Writer WITHOUT ASSISTANCE AND GREAT GNASHING OF TEETH, I will undoubtedly cause pig’s to fly. Let’s hope they are organic and raised humanely. Then, let’s eat them. (My apologies to all you vegans.)

Which brings up my next exciting news.

I contacted Chipotle about supporting our efforts during the 30-Day Throw Down. Our first 30-Days will eliminate fast food and highly processed foods. Our next 30-Days will address another aspect to be announced. And so on and so forth, taking us through a year of healthy habits. Chipotle contacted me and is very supportive. I will be talking to them more and finding out about their offer of giveaways. I will also be contacting other folks about participating in our efforts and hope to bring you reasons (besides FEELING better!) and giveaways that will encourage you to continue on the journey, 30-Days at a time.

I need this! I’ve been doing it for two weeks already and can attest to the difference I feel, and also the difference I feel when I don’t. I’ve been my own test subject with a Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde thing goin’ on. Cambria was an eye opener but I’ll leave that for the next few days.

In the meantime, love yourself enough to spend 7 minutes to watch something that will educate you about a different way of doing business and growing food. Gear up to support your efforts and invest in yourself. Steve Ellis, founder of Chipotle was interviewed on “Nightline.” And I am highly impressed with what he’s doing.

By the way, their slogan? “Slow food, fast.” More and more of these types of restaurants will pop up when we, as consumers, vote with our dollars.

Happy Monday to you and if you started homeschooling today, waved good-bye as you dropped off your kiddos at school, or, like me, survived the stampede of the college student, please know my heart is with you. It must be. I find I’m missing SEVERAL body parts since the rodeo.

Copyright 2009

Homeschooling: An Insider's View - Lacks Humor

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About thirteen years ago I formally started this little thing called homeschooling.

Homeschooling was first introduced to me while driving and listening to Dr. James Dobson on "Focus on the Family." He was interviewing Dr. Raymond S. Moore and his wife, Dorothy, on their new book entitled "Homeschool Burnout." I was on the road a lot and traveling a great deal with my job. And I was pregnant with Hannah-Bo. I knew I didn't want to travel forever and I had been trying to have a baby for years. (The subject of another post!) I knew when I heard the concept, homeschooling was for us. When it was time, I would be home and be her teacher.

Grizzly thought I was nuts.

He frequently has that thought so this was not daunting.

I did what I always do. I bought the book, read it, and then told him he should read it, too. (I actually thought this would work for the first fifteen years of our marriage. I'm a slow learner. How high does that book stack have to GET before a person catches on?) Next, I moved on to reading him short passages and giving him upshots. Then came another book and so on and so forth. He started to think it could work.

Not so much the rest of the world we lived in.

As homeschoolers, one of the questions we get asked most frequently is, "What about socialization?" After teaching for all these years I usually quip, "Don't worry about them. They have friends galore. It's ME you need to be concerned about. All I do is drive them from one thing to another and I HAVE no social life!" And ten years ago I would have completely dismissed the inquiry and been puffed up with my own opinion. But I was an idiot. It's a valid

question.

In forming my opinions about public school I looked at crime statistics, teen pregnancies, fractured parental and child relationships, and the complete void of moral and spiritual training in some schools. I wasn't impressed with THAT method of socialization. I researched overall test scores. I recalled my own abysmal school career and being missed by nearly every teacher while my home life crashed down around me for years.

Grizzly's experiences weren't much better and he'd been at private Christian school as well as public. What WOULDN'T recommend homeschooling to us?

And I thought homeschooling was inherently good, just by the nature of having constant parental involvement. I was wrong. All parties involved would have to be inherently good for that equation to balance and I haven't met that perfect person yet, especially when I look in the mirror. It just ain't so.

As my children grew I did see marvelous examples of great kids from homeschooling families. High achievers, well adjusted, future movers and shakers. But let's be honest: I saw a few terrible ones as well. Kids who had obviously not been taught much, especially manners and respect for others. And kids who were intelligent and educated academically but who brought the ugliest of judgmental attitudes down on those who didn't dress, or believe, or act exactly the way they, or their family, did. Their families taught by unflattering comparisons, instead of by Truth and love. I did it, too, at times, and had to repent mightily when I saw the ugly fruit it bore. Ouch.

But what I figured out was this: some parents public/private school their children and they could, or should, be homeschooling, for a variety of reasons. And some kids who are homeschooled would be better served by being in a public/private setting, for a variety of reasons. There isn't a one-size-fits-all approach. Life doesn't come with a template but it does come with challenges. God will meet us in those challenges and direct us. And we aren't God. Our job is to pray, and encourage, and help one another.

I have dear friends who are public school teachers. Some of them homeschool their own children and some teach in the public sector. I know how invested they are in the children in their classes and the love they give them might be the only love those children know anywhere in their lives. I am grateful for them. I am thankful for them.

I also have friends who send their kids to public/private school and they are caring, concerned, loving, fanTAStic parents. (I even have two friends who do all three with different kids - hi Teresa! - hi Kim!)

And I'm absolutely blessed by parents who make daily sacrifices and do without to honor their calling and serve their children by teaching them in their home. It's constant. It's 24/7. It's trench work. It's pushing rocks up a hill on a lot of days. But what it isn't, or shouldn't be, is about competition for who's the better parent and an either/or in school choices.

I've taken my share of heat. Family isn't always supportive. Public school advocates are sometimes prejudiced, even ugly and unkind, and think we're freaks. Well, we are freaks so that doesn't hurt our feelings. We're just not freaks in the way they think we are! Yes, there is sometimes a presumption that we do nothing and have no standards. No, my school doesn't look like any other school. I don't think I have a market on how all school should be done. I reinvent myself each year and throw out what doesn't work and press on. No, there isn't a perfect formula. If you're super strong in one area, you are probably weaker in another. NO ONE does it ALL. Public, private, or homeschooler.

My response has been to keep on keepin' on. Except on the days I don't. And then I rebel. And then I get over it. It's a theme in my life.

So with that involved, tedious, opinionated, and probably boring introduction into how we got where we are, and how we do what we do, and I'll say that I'm proud I homeschool, and not in a prideful way. I celebrate what homeschooling is and say my thankful prayers to God. And I will tell you some fantastic news about Hannah-Bo.....

tomorrow. It's a win for anyone who homeschools and needs hope that their children can compete on the academic front lines. See ya then!

Copyright 2009