Sunday, May 9, 2010

It’s Mother’s Day When I SAY It’s Mother’s Day, Dang It

And I say it’s not today. Not for me. I’m happy for all of you and hope you are celebrating every sticky kiss and chubby armed hug you have ever received. May you revel in surviving all the really scary diapers and the endless years of night duty with its accompanying sleep deprivation and bags under your eyes large enough to tote your groceries. And may you always have the color crayon drawing that’s been kept on the refrigerator for ten years even though it’s splashed, stained, and frayed and would permanently banish you from operating in certain social circles. Well, maybe that last one is just me.

Please don’t get me wrong. I think this is a high-holy day in the Mothering Kingdom. Motherhood is like the Peace Corp whose slogan is “It’s the hardest job you’ll ever love.” I consider becoming a mother to be THE high point of my life and I LOVE my job with my whole heart.

But that’s why I can’t celebrate today. I am rescheduling. And who’s to say I can’t? I have this rebellious streak in me that has often pondered rescheduling ALL holidays. Let’s face it: Jesus wasn’t born on December 25th. But someone at some point said, “Close enough,” and we all crowded into the stores to obey their directive and meet their timetable. We have discussed celebrating a week later. Can you imagine? Time to enjoy everyone else and ponder the meaning of Christmas? All the activities you wouldn’t resent? Deep breathing. The money saving sales?

And what would Valentine’s Day be a week later? Less crowded? Your favorite table at that romantic restaurant with no long line and a waiter who doesn’t hate you? 75% off that to-die-for box of chocolates at your favorite chocolatier?

I’m having a hard time seeing the downside.

And in that vein, I AM rescheduling Mother’s Day. It’s been a challenging week and the timing is all off.


  • Monday/Tuesday – stomach flu, major nerve pain
  • Tuesday-Friday – throat infection
  • Wednesday – beloved dog dies
  • Thursday – beloved dog funeral
  • Saturday – Grizzly works his 13th day in a row (afraid to turn down any overtime because the company broke us with his ozone injury and their refusal to pay for his time off, even though he STILL hasn't recovered), while also fitting in a major repair job on the Jeep so he can get to work, major repair job at my mom’s fixing two well pumps because she can’t afford to hire anyone and she had no water, and completing major electrical work at our church because it’s overdue and well, it’s the CHURCH. If he runs screaming into the forest and never returns, I completely understand and hope he remembers his warm coat.
  • Saturday – spent with baseball, my mom, shopping for her and taking her to lunch, addressing difficulties and concerns, and listening to revisionist history storytelling while practicing joy, patience, and functional insanity. Fighting yawning while being sleep deprived after dealing with the crazy drug addicted neighbor and sitting with her kids at 3:30 in the morning after they called the police on her, for the 30th time.
  • Saturday – Same neighbor sells me a bogus ticket to a contest at her daughter’s school and I bite, thinking no one would stoop so low as to use your feelings for their child as a way into your pocket (I’ve obviously had little experience with this and am a COMPLETE doofus), only to find out from another neighbor the daughter says there IS no contest and mom is raising drug money.
  • Saturday – Drug mom shows up at my door and wants a ride to where else? THE DRUG STORE. I decline and tell her she needs help and that I know the contest was a fake. I am cursed and told I have no right to call myself a Christian. I think I do have a right to call myself a doofus.
  • Sunday – TODAY. Daughter is in finals and must study all day so can’t take time off to hang out with us and I don’t choose to do Mother’s Day without her.
  • Sunday – Our attorney wants to meet with us because his wife is out of town and he is available. I don’t usually meet with attorneys on Mother’s Day but am grateful nonetheless for his concern for our needs. Additionally, our health insurance is changing and all forms need to be filled out to turn in tomorrow. What says Mother’s Day more than bureaucratic red tape?
  • Sunday – Remain vigilant. Drug mom grows creepier and more threatening.
  • Final Decision? DO OVER!


How about you? Do you ever consider rescheduling holidays or birthdays? (Don’t even get me STARTED on birthdays. I have birthSEASONS, not days.)

So, for all of you lovely traditionalists, I honor you and love you and hope you receive the props I KNOW you deserve. I wish I could hug each one of you for the kindness, generosity, and affection you’ve shown me. But when I sit down to my Mother’s Day dinner, in a few weeks, after the rush is over, I’ll lift my cup to you then.

Happy Mother’s Day!

©Copyright 2010

Images Courtesy of Available Internet Images and Pam Warden, Artist and Obvious Genius – products available through


  1. When I was raising my kids we did Thanksgiving on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. I worked so hard there was no way I could do anything on Thursday so on Friday I would shop and Saturday would cook and have my kids invite their friends for our Thanksgiving dinner. We changed days of birthdays too when we needed to. So I understand what you are saying.

  2. Robynn...I'm so sorry about your week...sounds like a terrrrible week, and I wonder how in the world you keep your beautiful sense of humor. You spread sunshine through the rain...and I want to tell you that if you want to start "Let's Postpone Mother's Day Until a Later Day" campaign, I'd like to join. I am soooo with you on this one, girl...
    I hug you Robynn.
    I'm so sorry about the illnesses, the pain and loss that you have gone through with the loss of your beloved pet, the loss of your Mom's well pump, the company's refusal to do the right thing when you husband had to be off work...I'm not taking any of these lightly...they are all serious and troubling ordeals, and I hope that you know that as I read them, I thought, "And she continues to show and share the love of the Lord through all these things." Robynn, I'm thankful that you cared for your neighbor's children...precious and innocent they are. You are an inspiration to me...and I want you to know that I love your blog...your style...and your patience.
    Here's a hug for you....and a wish for a Happy Day!! :))

  3. Having been divorced in 1979, the kids and I celebrated holidays the sunday after for years; they would have the actual holiday with their dad and his parents, and the following sunday, we'd celebrate. So rescheduling holidays is nothing new to me!

  4. I'm thinking of changing my birthday because nobody ever remembers the real one, which is too near Christmas (apparently). At least if I changed it they wouldn't have to think of an excuse. See?

  5. Hey girl, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do... So I say no biggie. It's suposed to be MOTHER'S day, and if changing the date to suit YOU and the schedules of your "tribe", is what you - as a MOTHER - wants to do, just go ahead and do it!
    Being where I am, Mother's Day is no big deal to me anyway. I got enough spoiling and cups of coffee in bed while I was in CA, to keep a smile on my face for most of the year anyway. Who need to put a name or date on it?

    And the kids next door? You're an amazing, caring, Christian woman and I'm proud to call you my friend! Hopefully, that mother can 'someday' get her life together enough to realize what the rest of us already know. You're a jewel!

  6. A definite do over is in order. I'm all for having things when and if the time is right!

  7. Waaaaay more on your plate than any Momma should have to contend with! Yowza... no doubt I too would call one big do-over! I don't know how you manage to keep your sanity intact and add in your dose of humor, but you are a one-of-a-kind resilient force to be reckoned with. Drug neighbor momma better watch out!

    Sending big love and hugs to you!!

  8. Oh, Robynn..WHAT A WEEK YOU'VE HAD!!!! My goodness!!! If anyone deserves a do-over, that person is YOU!!! I LOVE you! I'm sending lots of cyber hugs...and a cup of camomile tea...and we'll celebrate Mother's Day together in a few weeks...'cause I don't DO mother's day... or birthdays...I hate any fuss...but I'll do it for you. :-) Love you so very much! You are hilariously funny...especially because we can sooo relate to this...the best humor comes from life, doesn't it! Even those gosh awful moments...perhaps, especially from those gosh awful moments... And I love "doing" life with Robynn...'cause she's the very, very best!!! Love you so much!!! Janine XO

    P.S. I've been praying for you, but obviously I don't have much clout ;-) Sorry...LOL...

  9. What Janine said. Again and again, I applaud your decision to wait. Who says Mother's Day is today? In England it's in March. You are in the Country of Robynn, and the Matriarch decides when it's time, so there! I am so sorry for all you've been through this week. What a challenge for you, but your humor will carry the day!

  10. I really agree with your ideas on this subject. Hallmark Holidays make me ask why are we such sheep? It is such an obvious commercial event that it is a little embarrassing that we fall in line and do the expected. It raises such phoney expectations that it reflects how we should respect and make mothers feel special year round. Same with other holidays. We can be thankful every day of the year without declaring it a commercial holiday. You raised a great concept.

  11. I'm so sorry you lost your beloved dog. I feel your pain, having lost my Athena just last month--as you already know, because you wrote me the sweetest comment on my post about her!

    I'm sorry also that you are not feeling well. I empathize with you on that one, too.

    I'll be thinking about you and keeping you in my prayers! And thanking God that he gave you the gift of humor that shines through even though you're stressed to the max!

    Hugs, dear friend!

  12. All I can say is Robynn, I love you and you do whatever you want with Mother's Day. You earned it by golly after this past week!

  13. Wow. That is an AMAZINGLY bad week, I hope you can sit down with a large glass of something wonderful, and loolax. (sorry, I choose to speak like my children) Anyway, I hate hallmark holiday crap, and I think your idea is a wonderful one. I tend to intentionally and loudly and rudely NOT celebrate mothers day, fathers day, valentines days, etc., because it annoys me that the calender tells me I MUST celebrate it and pay rediculous sums of money for cards and gifts and whatnot on THAT day! So, I don't. The end.

  14. Ah, Robynn, you're so funny! Sorry you've had the week from hell but it makes for interesting reading!

    I've had quite a morning myself. Went for a 6am walk as usual with my friend. We had a fight about 2 minutes into the walk and um, I don't think we are friends anymore! Gulp! She butted in on a story I was relaying to her, I called her on it, she accused me of always shutting her down and stormed off ahead of me, walking at double pace. I wouldn't back down and say sorry so I peeled off an walked my own way home! So there! I haven't done anything like this since kindergarten! But I'm standing my ground - stuff her!

    Hee hee - venting over.

    Cheers - Joolz

  15. It's only Mother's Day in the US.. Britain has already had its Mother's Day and in Sweden I think it's at the end of May... So hey, you're just being a global citizen!

    Sounds like one horrific week. It can only get better...


  16. I totally agree with you. Who cares what day it is. We should do what works for us as a family. Should we be upset because a person is working or away when a certain day comes along..a Hallmark Holiday so to speak.
    Sounds like you are really having a rough time. Shoulders back, head up and stay away from the crackhead neighbor.

  17. Oh Robynn,

    I don't blame you one bit for rescheduling. What an absolutely horrid week you've had. I can't even begin to imagine and your beloved dog dying on top of all the other chaos. You poor thing! I just wish I could reach through the computer and give you a hug. Take care of yourself and you are in my prayers.

  18. LOL! Sorry,could'nt help but laugh.You have such a great sense of humor and sorry you had such a bad week...We have moved our holidays to the following weekend.One year we were tired of the traditional Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners so we had steak instead.
    Happy Mothers day my friend!Whenever you choose to have it!

    Keep on Truckin!

  19. I think you could be onto something.

    I say we move Arbor Day to August. There aren't any other holidays then.

    I'm sorry you had a bad week, though. I hope your not-Mother's Day was a good one!

  20. Since you are the Mother you can decide to do what ever it is you want!!! Go for it girl...

    Hope you enjoyed your day what ever you did!!!

  21. You just go ahead and have Mother's Day whenever you want...hey, have two. Have one every month for the rest of the year! lol
    Sorry about what sounded like a really bad week.
    As for me, I spent it with my mom. We went out to lunch, then shopping. Sans kiddos!! My dear hubby spent the day with the kids. :) Best Mother's Day gift I could have been given.

  22. Thanks for your comments on my blog..and I agree you should have a totally do-over!! Perhaps a weekend..oh heck, why not a month away.

    Looks like you are getting a whole lot of lovin' from your friends here, I hope that it carries you through all the difficulties thrown your way!

  23. I think it is your absolute right as the mother of the house to make YOUR day whenever you want to make your day. And I don't think it is unChristian to tell said drug mom the jig is up. It might be unChristian to trip her so she falls down and then sit on her and tell her the jig is up and she needs a "come to Jesus" reckoning before she loses her kids or gets killed trying to score her drugs or kills herself with an overdose. And is California so broke that welfare won't get those kids out of that atmosphere??? Pay no attention to my ranting... I just broke out in shingles yesterday and have had no sleep yet and it is almost 6:30 in the morning and the only time one should be up at 6:30 A.M. is when one has been having a darn good time all night long and that's definitely not the situation in my case... but I did finally put up a new post... What with all the tornadoes tearing up the state I figured I better let anyone who cares anymore know that I'm still alive. And aren't we both glad that we have this wonderful blog zone out here in the ozone that we can let off steam into without carbon dioxide dirtying up our air.

    Love you SASS!!!

  24. YES, YES, YES!!!! Mother's Day do-over sounds lovely...but YOU really do deserve a do-over.

    I love the term "functional insanity" and believe i know a few people in my life that applies to, hopefully not me though!

    Can you believe that after I wrote that my word verification is "sycho"?