And I haven't been doing anything resembling much of this, either. You thought I was going to tell you I've whipped my house into shape didn't you? I mean, I try. I really do. But it's like bailing out the ocean with a thimble.
So what did I do on my summer vacation this winter?
Did I take care of my innards? I think the answer to this would be, "Yes," if by "take care of" I mean I saw to it that they stayed mostly inside my abdominal cavity. I feel I have been successful at that. I have not found my liver, spleen, or alternator just laying around anywhere. I haven't gone to McDonald's or Taco Bell. But if you mean I ate extremely well and juiced everyday then the answer gets hazier. Like Erica Kane's face (All My Children) as they film her through the years.
Ever notice that? I don't watch this soap opera anymore. I quit about ten years ago when I started choking on their political agenda. But I had watched it from the beginning. And whenever I happen to come across it in these past ten years I always notice that Erica is heavily filtered through a hazy lens. I can barely make out her features to be sure it's her. I know they're trying to keep the illusion of youth alive but it makes me feel incredibly old because my sight seems to be going each time she appears on screen.
I'll try to stick to the subject: Not being dead.
This morning as I laid, lied, lay, lie, lain, (the correct tense never sounds right to me and is my participle past, present, or dangling? Has it been dangling all day and no one told me?).....let's just go with "assumed a supine position in bed," and tried to add up everything that's been ailing me and keeping me from more than four or five hours of sleep every night. But by the time I approached the end of the list, I forgot my reason for counting. When I remembered why, I couldn't recall the point of the exercise. And you can be grateful for that little fact, my overtaxed readers.
I do know I can't sit for an extended period of time because I injured my tailbone and sitting is certainly a vital part of blogging. I remember this salient fact each time I park it. Which is frequently. Almost all of our homeschooling is on the computer.
Also, life hasn't felt very funny since my stepfather's death. We weren't especially close but my mom needs me a lot now and that's its own fresh challenge and excitement in the way climbing Mt. Everest in my bikini - with my current body and photographers all around - would be a fresh challenge filled with excitement. My only cheerful thought would be a timely plummet from a slippery precipice. However, by God's grace I am coping and seem to be some help, so I continue to tie off and use my safety gear, against my better judgment.
The other issue that is ever before me is the simple fact that writing attracts readers. And when readers come, readers who usually have blogs themselves, I like to visit back. And I can't right now. So that makes me feel greedy and makes me hesitate to write.
My solution is to absolve all of you from any obligatory visits and know that I will write and post here simply to remember what in the world I did with my life, when I look back someday. Feel free to stop in if you want to or skip me entirely. I will pop in to your places from time-to-time because I SERIOUSLY ENJOY reading about your lives. But I can't figure out how to have time for everything.
I am considering pulling down the 30 Day blog and simply accepting that combining the info here will be more in keeping with how I live my life - everything overlapping and mushed together. I don't think I can maintain two blogs and do them any justice.
And I have to finish ripping the wallpaper off my bathroom wall and repainting. Grizzly calls the current motif, "Late World War II." That's generous.
All I can offer, I suppose, is a stark comparison for you. Lay your inconsistencies against mine, consider the shadow your figure casts, gaze about your gracious abodes, and come away feeling incredibly successful, sane, and lovely.
To warp a borrowed epigram, I cannot be a good example but I happily offer myself as a terrible warning.
Hello again and thank you for all your kind wishes and inquiries. Really. You ARE the best. WHAT are you DOING here?
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